A Timeline of Newcastle’s Transfer Window of 2024 - The Summer of Panic or an Exercise in Stoicism?
As a Newcastle fan growing up in the early 2000s, I was surrounded by Mike Ashley relegations, Joe Kinnear press conference blunders and a voodoo doll-level curse in cup finals; all with the emo backdrop of Fall Out Boy and my Chemical Romance lyrics lacing every day with a healthy dollop of angst and profound sadness.
So, it’s fair to say I’m a pessimist when it comes to football. For the last two and a half decades, I’ve followed Newcastle with a blind sense of passion and belonging; not the expectation of silverware, or even a top-half finish. This devotion turned into something of an act of self-inflicted torture during the Steve Bruce days, where 28-percent possession, one shot on target, and a 4-0 drubbing was par for the course.
But the takeover changed that. It felt strange going into home games expecting to win, seeing players signed for upwards of 40 million, and the club hierarchy actually communicating with the fanbase. But as with all-things Newcastle; it hasn’t taken long for the negativity (at least from external sources) to begin to circulate around Saint James’ Park like a toxic cloud.
First, there was PSR… then came the injuries… then came fears that Eddie Howe was walking a tightrope of terror following a rotten December of 2023. But slowly steady the ship he did, and we actually entered May on the back of a decent upturn in form and Europe back in our hands.
That’s when things started to go slightly wrong; or did they?
Join me, as I (attempt) to chronicle every development of a quite frankly bizarre two months of off-the-pitch speculation, Game of Thrones-esque boardroom tumult and a surface-level concern with transfers (or lack thereof). But don’t worry - for once, I’m targeting a happy ending to this latest Newcastle soap opera saga.
The end of the season feels a lot longer than two months ago, but cast your minds back if you can… to May 19th…
May
- Newcastle overcome Brentford 4-2 to end their season on a high and secure 7th position (and hopefully, Europa Conference football).
- Having barely caught their breath from an exhausting, injury-ravaged season, Newcastle touch down on the opposite side of the world for a couple of kickabouts.
- In the latest slime-ridden actions of Dan Ashworth, the experienced gardener is reported to be forcing a move out of Tyneside by claiming he was ‘sacked’ by Newcastle.
- Newcastle field an extremely inexperienced XI for their second match in Australia - angering the fans who had turned out hoping to see their first-team heroes - and lose EIGHT-nil.
- Murmurs of discontent rumble around the media, reporting that Newcastle didn’t make anywhere near the money required to make the Australia trip worthwhile.
- Sir Jim Ratcliffe decides that a post-marathon interview live on TV is the perfect time to cry about Newcastle United not rolling over and letting him have a new plaything; Dan Ashworth.
- Manchester United pull off the perceived ‘impossible’ and beat Manchester City in the FA Cup Final; making Newcastle the first side in years to finish 7th and fail to play European football the following season.
- The media rumour mill goes into overdrive, with many outlets (particularly Talksport) churning out daily rubbish that Alexander Isak and Bruno Guimaraes will be desperate to move to Arsenal now Newcastle have missed out on European football.
June
Newcastle start the new month with the bombshell that long-term target Tosin Adarabioyo has decided to sit on the Chelsea bench instead of making his way to Newcastle. Tosin apparently chose to ignore the circus surrounding the Chelsea squad last season, and must be delighted at his new teammate Enzo Fernandes’ recent racist behaviour.
Kieran Trippier and Anthony Gordon are confirmed on the plane with England to Euro 2024. Gordon would go on to play just four minutes in seven matches, as obvious natural left-winger Phil Foden was preferred ahead of him.
Sir Jim Ratcliffe once again decides to air his dirty laundry (and his immature narcissistic tendencies) in another interview, this time describing Newcastle as ‘difficult’.
Newcastle's ‘marquee signing’ dreams of ensnaring Michael Olise end in predictable fashion as the winger opts to join Bayern Munich. I mean… fair enough on that one.
Just as Kieran Trippier prepares to face Slovenia in England’s crucial Group Stage decider, his wife Charlotte decides to ‘unfollow’ the Newcastle full-back on Instagram and post cryptic messages about ‘getting over s***’. Great timing.
Fabricio Romano confirms that Bruno Guimaraes’ £100M release clause has expired. Despite this, the media now determine that this means he will be available at a considerably lower fee. What?
As the PSR deadline moves closer, Newcastle appear entirely flat-footed in their quest to avoid a mooted ‘10-point deduction’. Panic seemingly arose after no one activated Bruno’s release clause.
Apparently overnight, Elliot Anderson and Yankuba Minteh are foisted off to Nottingham Forest and Brighton respectively, hopefully not at gunpoint. Newcastle bring in two new goalkeepers, despite only being able to field one goalkeeper on the pitch at any one time.
Rumours circulate that Newcastle tried to orchestrate a deal with Liverpool for Anthony Gordon as all hope at one point seemed lost at meeting the PSR allowance.
July
- Newcastle United and Sir Jim’s club both announce that Dan AshWormTongue has joined the red part of Salford.
- After days of speculation, Amanda Staveley and Mehrdad Ghodoussi are confirmed to have left the club, amping up talk of unrest, boardroom overhauls, and Eddie Howe losing his biggest allies in the club.
- After another limp performance in a Euros Final, Gareth Southgate resigns. Eddie Howe is immediately enlisted as the favourite for the job.
- Our old friends from Talksport immediately interview every man and his dog in the country who wants Eddie Howe as England manager, despite many of these people saying Eddie Howe wasn’t the man to take Newcastle forward at numerous points of his SJP tenure.
- Eddie Howe affirms his commitment to Newcastle in light of recent speculation linking him to the England job, prefacing that commitment with the slight jab that he needs to “remain happy” - which was of course, then leaped upon by the outside naysayers.
- Right on cue, long-serving goalscorer (but perennially injured) striker Callum Wilson is reportedly ruled out of the season’s opener with a back problem.
- Rumours that new signing Lloyd Kelly has joined Callum Wilson on the injury list make it a very real possibility that we could currently start next season with no new outfield senior players.
- At the time of publication, news is gathering traction that Newcastle have agreed personal terms with Chelsea winger Noni Madueke - the light at the end of the tunnel?
Moving Forward
Now, take a deep breath. So where does all this leave us?
Well, it’s a matter of perspective. On one hand, we’ve failed to make a serious signing to improve our first XI, and are linked with losing our most successful manager in two decades with a matter of weeks to go until the season starts.
Not ideal, right?
Except, until you look at the fact that all this negativity is being spun by outside sources. Peace and prosperity don’t sell papers or get clicks online; and Newcastle’s recent upturn in fortunes on and off the pitch have made them a juicy target for the nation’s latest ‘build ‘em up to knock ‘em down’ story; much like Eddie Howe himself.
Inside the club, things seem to be going well. The club avoided a disastrous sale of a key senior player, we’ve hired a Sporting Director with immense pedigree, and the board is taking their time to get his feet under the table, develop a healthy working partnership with Howe, and not rush recklessly into needless signings that won’t benefit the long-term goals of the club.
Recent signings such as Alexander Isak, Tino Livramento and Lewis Hall were brought in very late on in summer transfer windows, while the analysis and pursuit of Anthony Gordon rolled on into a midseason purchase. We are no longer a reactive and passive club, but an active, (albeit patient) operator that does things on our terms (just look at how Dan Ashworth was handled) and certainly doesn’t listen to outside noise.
Perhaps it’s a trait us as fans need to adopt too…
The signings will come… players will return from injury… and (whisper it quietly) but missing out on midweek trips to Azerbaijan gives us a golden opportunity to attack the league head-on with minimal rotation - unlike our competitors.
As a fanbase we need to keep the faith, even the pessimists among us like myself.
I’m still listening to Fall Out Boy on a daily basis though - some things never change.
