Newcastle United crash out of Carabao Cup in spectacular fashion amid another Etihad Stadium demolition
We weren't expecting much from tonight's game before we went in, but we have to doff our caps for Newcastle United for exceeding our embarrassingly low expectations by being somehow, even worse than we were expecting.
At least in the first half. Newcastle United finally managed to register a goal at the Etihad Stadium, their first in 11 attempts, but it came midway through the second half with Manchester City already well out of sight.
Eddie Howe's tactic of playing five at the back made absolutely no difference to anything, and it took City just seven minutes to break the deadlock and turn Mission: Impossible into Mission: Why Even Bother?.
There was a huge element of fortune for the goal, with it coming after Dan Burn made a sliding challenge which flicked the ball onto Omar Marmoush's shins, and it looped up and over Aaron Ramsdale.
Newcastle United clattered out of the Carabao Cup 5-1 on aggregate
Omar Marmoush was on the scoresheet again just past the half-hour mark, taking his tally against Newcastle to five goals in two games. Naturally, he's a player who was once linked with a move to Newcastle.
As is James Trafford who made a couple of crucial saves throughout the first half when Newcastle did find themselves in good positions, although the finishing from Joe Willock and Anthony Gordon left a lot to be desired.
Man City went 3-0 up just a few minutes after Marmoush doubled their lead with Tijjani Reijnders applying the finish for that one. That proved to be too much for Anthony Gordon who plonked himself on the ground and claimed to have a hamstring problem, but then walked off the field with absolutely zero difficulties and nary a hint of a limp.
If I didn't have this job, I'd have turned that off at half time
Eddie Howe made three changes at half-time, rejigging the entire front line, bringing on Anthony Elanga and Yoane Wissa to join Harvey Barnes, who replaced Anthony Gordon and also throwing on Jacob Murphy.
The reward for those changes was a much better performance, although Man City had taken their foot off the gas by this point. Anthony Elanga finally opened his account for the Magpies with a superb goal, cutting in from the wing and bending the ball into the far corner beyond James Trafford.
My theory about Anthony Elanga just needing a goal to get his confidence back was immediately proven to be absolute garbage when Elanga missed an absolute sitter just a couple of minutes later.
I also have to make a special mention to Yoane Wissa, who graduated with honours this week from the Papiss Cisse School of Beating the Offside Trap.
It's Brentford at home in the Premier League next up, and honestly, I don't even know what to expect.
