Sun 3 Dec 2023, 11:59 · Ash Harrison

Man Utd (H) player ratings: Everyone shone in this 1–0 battering but the opposition were shocking

Man Utd (H) player ratings: Everyone shone in this 1–0 battering but the opposition were shocking
Serena Taylor/Newcastle United
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Eddie Howe got the better of Erik ten Hag for a third successive game thanks to another dominant performance from the Magpies against the Red Devils.

We called Manchester United 'amusingly naff' in the buildup to the contest and that description was probably too polite based on what they served up at St James'.

That's not to take anything away from the efforts of those in black and white, though, who outplayed and outworked their opposition from the first whistle.

This was yet another match in which there wasn't a poor display from anyone in our colours, despite it being the third fixture in a week with the same starting eleven.

We could have given 'POTM' to pretty much anyone

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Serena Taylor/Newcastle United
Hands up if you played a blinder

Nick Pope – 8

He only faced one shot on target in the contest from Garnacho and saved it well, while his distribution was the best it's been for a while. Unfortunately, it looks as though he dislocated his shoulder late on and he could now be facing months on the sidelines.

Kieran Trippier – 9

It took him a little while to feel his way into the game, but once he got up to speed he played at his top level both in possession and defensively. His assist for Gordon's winner was pinpoint and he was so unlucky with the first-half free kick that hit the underside of the bar.

Jamaal Lascelles (c) – 9

This was another huge performance from the captain, who won 8/9 aerial duels to nullify the visitors' industrial long ball game. He continues to grow in confidence when in possession, too, and had the highest pass completion of anyone in black and white (or yellow).

Fabian Schär – 9

'Fab' put on another masterclass here, taking every opportunity to drive forward with the ball and making light work of defending against Martial/Højlund. The only surprise was that he didn't bag himself a goal, as he had a couple of decent long-range opportunities.

Tino Livramento – 9

The constant chanting of 'Tino' by the crowd said it all about Livramento's display; he was superb yet again despite being out of position. The understanding with Gordon isn't quite there yet, but when they click they're going to be genuinely unplayable. He's electric.

Lewis Miley – 9

These games already appear to be 'water off a duck's arse' to Miley, who put in his best showing yet since becoming a starter. His defensive positioning and general awareness are amazing for his age, and he's offering more and more when he gets on the ball as well.

Bruno Guimarães – 9

Since signing his new contract he has been back to his best and he seemed to relish the occasion here. He consistently got the better of the other 'Bruno' in duels, recycled the ball excellently, and ran himself into the ground to ensure we saw the game out.

Joelinton – 9 ⭐️

This was Joelinton at his very best. He even had us feeling something approaching sympathy for McTominay by the end after battering him throughout. He made the best chance of the first half for Almirón, won 10/12 duels, and earned five free-kicks. Just superb.

Miguel Almirón – 8

'Miggy' missed the best two chances in the opening period and also failed to find Gordon with what looked to be a simple through-ball to send him one-on-one. Despite those flubs, his pressing and tracking back was critical to the ease of the victory. He ran Dalot ragged.

Alexander Isak – 8

He was great in the first half, dropping off Maguire and Shaw into pockets of space and showing some lovely close control to evade markers. Tiredness crept in during the second period, understandably, and his threat waned, but he still played a big part in the win.

Anthony Gordon – 9

Although he looks to be feeling some fatigue after playing so many minutes this season, he continues to come up with crucial goals and assists. This was his sixth league strike of the season and his fourth in a row at home. He's been absolutely incredible this season.

Howe was forced to turn to his bench this time out

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Profimedia/Getty Images
Newcastle picked up another casualty

Martin Dúbravka – 6

'Dubs' didn't have a save to make in his brief cameo but did make one very important claim to relieve the modicum of late pressure that the visitors applied.

Matt Ritchie – 6

He was brought on to run the clock down more than anything else and didn't manage to get a touch of the ball in his few minutes on the pitch.

Next up for the Magpies is Everton away

Anthony Gordon
TNT Sports
Gordon returns to Everton on Thursday

We return to the scene of the best non-assist we've ever witnessed, with Goodison Park the destination for a 7.30 p.m. kick-off on Thursday night.

Everton are the opponents, of course, and the match will be broadcast live on Amazon Prime. What are the odds of another Gordon goal? We'd bloody love it.

Howay the lads!